Sawsame Street
by Mr. Awesome Guitarfreak
Summary: Elmo and friends step into a manhole and discover the horrors of Jigsaw. First ever Sesame Street-Saw Crossover. Rated T for what Elmo calls 'ketchup' and scary themes.
1. Let The Games Begin

**Chapter One: Let The Games Begin**

While Elmo was walking around Sesame Street, he saw the most intriguing manhole to jump into. He then saw Tele and Zoey and they asked him just what he was doing.

"Elmo's going to dive into that manhole," he responded gingerly.

"Well, maybe we should join you, you know, and be like, the Manhole Diving Monster Clan!" Tele said.

"Elmo likes that idea," said Elmo, "In fact, maybe we should have a jingle. Let's parade around Sesame Street and have fun!"

Zoey cheered. And the three chanted, blissfully unaware of what would come next. For this manhole had not been part of Sesame Street since it's grand opening. But they didn't know that. They just jumped in. And in they went. It was like an enormous chute. And they went down. Elmo with his cheerful laugh, Zoey screaming, and Tele with his triangle-shaped helmet. It was all good. Then when the giant chute came to an end, the manhole was dark and eerie.

"Elmo doesn't like this place so much," said Elmo.

"Yeah," said Tele, "It looks a lot like the dark in my bedroom."

The three kept walking until a voice from seemingly nowhere screamed, "INTRUDERS!!!"

"Elmo thinks he wet himself." Then it was quiet. The voice had come from nowhere they could remember hearing it. And they were put to sleep by the fumes in the room.

The next morning, though, they found themselves trapped inside a room with spikes all along the walls, their bodies hung by their feet from nooses. It had been Jigsaw. He, Jigsaw, was the worst villain ever. In Elmo's mind, he was worse than The Boogeyman and the monsters under his bed, put together.

"Elmo knows he has red fur, but he thinks that some ketchup is coming out of his arm."

"That's not ketchup!" Jigsaw roared. "But tomorrow, your task will make you see even more 'ketchup' than you've ever produced in your life. Until then, you will hang there. Let the games begin!!!" The lights went dark and Zoey gulped.


	2. The First Test of Torture

**Chapter Two: The First Test Of Torture**

Jigsaw sent a disturbing message through the loudspeaker, the only thing that Elmo, Tele, and Zoe could hear him on. Jigsaw began with, "It is my pleasure to introduce to you your first test of torture."

The wall on which Elmo, Tele, and Zoe were hung from swiveled around and they saw a pool with spikes on the bottom of it. "Your first test is to find the key hidden at the bottom of this pool! The one who finds the key first may proceed to the second test of torture. As for the losers, scary things will happen. SCARY THINGS!!!" _This is way too easy, _Jigsaw thought. The nooses slowly released the monsters' feet and they dove into the pool with spikes on the bottom.

"But Jigsaw, Elmo doesn't have his bathing suit and swim floaties on," said Elmo.

"DIVE!!!" Jigsaw screamed. And so Elmo jumped in. He was scared. He'd never actually swum without wearing his bathing suit, floaties, goggles, the whole shebang. And now he was having to swim without any of that and search for a key so that he could save his own life. Meanwhile, Tele was being a wimp. He would not jump!!! Eventually he got so scared that he fainted. And because he didn't find the key, scary things would happen to him. Elmo and Zoe were going as deep as they could searching for the key and trying to take a breath of air. But eventually, Jigsaw enclosed the pool so that if they went to take a breath, then they would die because of the spikes above.

Then, the water in the pool started sinking, it got lower and lower until the pool was completely drained. Elmo found the key, but he couldn't reach the lock. And all of a sudden, a gas was being sprayed in the enclosed, spiky, drained pool. Zoey wilted instantly, but Elmo jumped up and shoved the key into the lock and twisted. The gas stopped spraying, the spikes retracted, and the room went back to its normal form.

"Okay," Jigsaw began, "Now that you have found the key, you may proceed to the next test of torture! And as for the losers, they will be punished!"

"Geez," Zoe interjected, "That's a big word, Mr Scary Jigsaw man!"

* * *

Meanwhile, back at Sesame Street, Grover, Bert, and Ernie were searching for Elmo, so they asked Oscar where he might be. His response was,

"Stop bothering me and have a rotten day!"

Big Bird offered to help search for Elmo, and Baby Bear and Cookie Monster searched with them. They then decided to search in a manhole that had some red fur nearby. All of them jumped in.

"Elmo?! Elmo, where could you be?"

All they heard after that was a scream of pain. It sounded like Tele. They were horrified to know what he was being tortured with.

* * *

Tele had his feet nailed to the floor and his eyes permanently fixed on the image of Lady GaGa in front of him. He was also forced to listen to her music. He screamed for help, but his pleas were ignored, thanks to Jigsaw. He was yelling and laughing at the top of his lungs, making sure that no one could hear Tele. At that moment, it seemed that there was no hope for Tele. He was doomed. DOOOOOOOOOOOMED!!! He let out another scream of pain and his ears began to malfunction. The sound of the music was unbearable. Never in his life had he witnessed that horrible of a punishment. But worse had yet to come.


	3. Six More Join the Games

**Chapter Three: Six More Join the Party**

Poor Elmo. His fur must have been on a little too tight. Shame for him, though. Jigsaw nearly wasted him. Nearly.

"Okay," began Jigsaw as Elmo and Zoë watched him appear on camera, each trapped in their own electric chair. "We'll be playing another game today." A maniacal laugh followed this threatening phrase.

"Jigsaw, Elmo doesn't like your games," said Elmo.

"I don't care. That's not how this works," replied Jigsaw coldly.

"Elmo thinks checkers is a funner game."

"I hate checkers!" Jigsaw protested.

"How about Mouse Trap? Elmo doesn't know a single person in Sesame Street that doesn't like Mouse Trap."

"I hate Mouse Trap, too!" said Jigsaw, aggravated. "You roll the dice and move your mice, and nobody gets killed. Where's the fun in that?"

"How about-" Elmo was cut off by Jigsaw's harsh,

"SHUT UP! How in the world is one single person such a nuisance to society. ELECTRIC CHAIR!"

With the flip of a switch, Jigsaw set Elmo's electric chair to high. Unfortunately, this didn't stop Elmo from annoying Jigsaw. A power surge saved Elmo from the inevitable, forcing him to simply go on and play the next "game."

"Elmo really likes his massage chair. Does it have any more features? Elmo could use a massage for his lower back. It gives him a lot of hurty feeling inside."

This next game tested Elmo's and Zoë's will to live.

Grover, Ernie, Bert, Big Bird, Baby Bear, and Cookie Monster were all shocked out of their minds when they finally comprehended the happenings right now.

"It's really dark in here," said Grover.

"ME WANT COOKIES!" screamed Cookie Monster.

"Oh, no!" cried Big Bird. "I'm afraid of the dark!"

"It's not so bad," said Baby Bear in a reassuring tone of voice.

"So what do you think is going to happen next, Rubber Ducky?" inquired Ernie.

Still, the six trudged on, hoping to find the one who screamed and Elmo. It was pitch dark at the bottom of this manhole they so unfortunately stumbled into. If you put a hand in front of your face, it could not be seen by a soul. Because of this, the four monsters, the bear, and the enormous, yellow bird could not tell if they had run into a wall before it was too late to change course. This made finding Elmo really hard. They only had their sense of sound and touch to depend on. At the end of what seemed like eighteen hours, the six friends slept in the darkness of the manhole, hoping that their night vision would kick in soon.

Elmo had been found! Not in the way that they wanted him to be found, but he was found all the same. The six, however, found themselves in a very huge dilemma the moment they found themselves in fat-suits and dangling from bungee cords. On every part of every wall, including the ceiling, there was enormous spikes the size of someone's head. The television in the corner of the room turned on, and Jigsaw was seen on the screen.

"You two, plus the eight that came from the manhole, will now have to acquire the pool noodles from the very bottom of this room. You will have to push the spikes up with the noodles in order to keep your head from being sliced right open. There are six noodles. Two of you will not get a noodle. You two will have to steal a noodle from someone else and protect yourself that way. If you try to get off the bungee cord, you will drown in the water because of the fat suit!" Jigsaw finished this monologue and the game began.

The eight bounced up and down on the bungee cords, and the fat suits made it even harder to get the noodles. The excess fat made it hard for the Sesame Street gang to get the noodles with their feet. Ernie finally got one, pushed a spike up, and got out of the room. Then his foot got caught in a snare and he hung from his feet.

"Woohoo! I did it! Look at me, Bert. I made it out of the game!" Ernie chanted happily.

"Ernie, I can't handle distractions right now. I'm trying to get the noodle with my foot! WOAH! AAH!" Bert's fat suit popped on one of the spikes, causing him to fall into the pool and get sucked down the drain. "HELP!" he screamed.

Zoë was the next one to grasp the noodle, put it over her head, push the spike up, and get caught in the snare.

"That was a blast!" she chuckled.

Big Bird and Elmo struggled to grasp the noodle and were repeatedly getting hit in the head by these spikes. Each of them now had huge dents in their head. This led Elmo to proclaim,

"Elmo's head really hurts now." He got the noodle with his hands instead, lifted it over his head, pushed the spike up, but his bungee cord snapped like a twig. He was now hanging on for dear life on the very spot where the spike was pushed up. Baby Bear came bouncing up and hit Elmo right into place. A snare caught his foot, and he was the third success. Baby Bear, however, also was pushed into the hanging room, but he was not on a snare. His foot was on the flat end of a spike. His weight pushed on the spike, causing it to land on the floor.

"OUCH!" yelped Grover. Speaking of Grover, he wasn't doing so well with this "game." When Jigsaw said game, he had interpreted it exactly the way Elmo had. He thought that the game was going to be something like Yatzhee or Backgammon, but he was wrong! Unprepared and confused, he slowly grasped the noodle but- _Aww!_ the blue monster thought. _So close, but so far._

Eventually, Baby Bear fell back into the pool room because he was not able to get into a snare trap with the bungee cord on his back. Unfortunately for him, a spike snipped his bungee cord and he was sucked into the drain with Bert. The rest of this "game" was quite insane.


	4. The Enchanted Ketchup Room

Chapter Four: In the Ketchup-Ketchup-Ketchup-Ketchup-Ketchup Room...

Elmo, Zœ, and Big Bird were wasted. The blunt edge of the spikes turned sharp on the snaretrapped and the snares, well, the snares...

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!" chuckled Jigsaw maniacally.

Way to interrupt me, man. The snares broke and "ketchup" went everywhere. As for the others…

It was a dark, quiet room. A pitch black area designated to nothingness. Nothing was happening. Cookie Monster, Ernie, Grover, Baby Bear, and Bert were all sitting down. They couldn't figure out where they were, but they were sitting down.

"Hello?" said Grover. "Is anybody here?"

"Grover? Is that you?" asked Bert.

"Hi, Bert!" Ernie exclaimed. "Rubber Ducky says 'Hi,' too."

"ME WANT COOKIES!"

"Cookie Monster, this is not the time!" said Baby Bear. "Where are we, anyway?"

That was a good question. The silence in the rest of the pitch black place came to an abrupt stop as the sound of flowing liquids carried into the monsters' ears. As well as hearing it, they began to feel it on the bottoms of their feet. But what was this strange liquid that was pouring into this dark place they were in?

"Do you guys feel that stuff on your feet?" asked Bert.

"Yuck! It feels like slimy goo!" said Ernie. "What do you think it is, Rubber Ducky?" Ernie squeaked the rubber duck and pretended like it could respond to his words.

"Maybe it's ketchup," offered Grover as the unknown liquid creeped up from their feet to the top of their calfs.

"Me think it Cookie Juice!" muttered Cookie Monster.

"Cookie Monster, there's no such thing," said Bert.

"Actually, you were right the first time!" said Jigsaw.

"Who said that?" Baby Bear asked with an afraid tone of voice. The liquid that filled the dark room now crawled up to their stomachs.

"It's me, Jigsaw! And the liquid is ketchup!"

"Real ketchup, or the ketchup that came out of Elmo?" asked Grover.

"Real ketchup. You have only one way of getting out. One of you has a button by your foot. You'll need to push it to drain out the ketchup. Also I just thought I'd let you know that your friends are dead," explained Jigsaw.

The ketchup now oozed up to the monsters' mouths.

"Mmmmm. It tastes good," said Grover.

"Yeah. But if we don't do something fast, we'll drown!" exclaimed Bert.

"Everyone search for a button with your feet!" yelled Ernie before he was drowned out by the ketchup hitting his mouth.

"Oh. There was one more thing," began Jigsaw. "The one of you who has the button by your foot just so happens to be unconscious. _Elmo_ has the button by his foot."

"Elmo! Wake up! Wake up!" all of them shouted. The unconscious monster slowly opened his eyes and stretched. His foot twitched a little bit, and he tapped the button, but not before uttering,

"There's blood EVERYWHERE!"

The ketchup drained to the bottom of the room and blinding light encompassed the darkness. Elmo had cuts and scars from the spikes, and his fur was red with real ketchup and blood.

"How'd you escape, Elmo?" asked Ernie.

"Elmo just woke up and it was really dark, and then Elmo started running and pushed a little button from his foot!"

"That's impossible!" proclaimed Jigsaw. "You, you were dead! I saw!"

There was so much ketchup in the ketchup room that all of the monsters could swim in it. All of them who knew how at least.

"Elmo is never dead yet. Elmo's only three years old. Uh huh. Yeah. He has his whole life ahead of him," said Elmo.

Jigsaw took a deep breath and sighed. The ketchup now filled the blindingly bright room to the point that only the monsters' heads were up.

"Rubber Ducky has got an idea!" yelled Ernie.

"What is it, Rubber Ducky?" asked Grover.

Ernie squeaked his rubber duck, pretending it could talk.

"He says we have to eat all the ketchup!" said Ernie.

"But there's so much ketchup!" argued Bert. "We'll never be able to eat it all!"

"Let's just do it and see what happens," said Baby Bear.

And with that, the monsters began sucking down as much ketchup as possible. This proved to be all they could do to get it back down to ankle level. All of the monsters emerged with full stomachs, knowing there was only a little ketchup left.

"Ugh," groaned Bert. "I- I can't finish!"

"Do it! It has to be done!" pleaded Cookie Monster.

"Hey, Cookie Monster! You haven't eaten anything. Finish the job!" Bert told Cookie.

"That, that not cookie!"

Baby Bear did some fast thinking to save this.

"It was a cookie! A big red cookie! But it got destroyed! The letter of the day on it was 'R!'"

Cookie Monster bought all of it and finished the last drop. Jigsaw congratulated the newly overweight monsters on eating fifty pounds of ketchup and they were forced to stay in that room for the rest of the day. It smelled of nothing but ketchup, which made having to pee a lot more tolerable.


	5. Many People Die In This Chapter

**Chapter Five: Many People Die In This Chapter**

Though it had only been hours, it felt like days in the ketchup room. Elmo, Baby Bear, Ernie, Bert, Grover, and Cookie Monster all grew wary and weak. Even though they had all collectively eaten a ton of ketchup, they required additional sustenance. The odor of ketchup was inescapable, as many of it still remained on the walls and floors. The monsters, stomachs grumbling, tried to find a way out before it was the end for them. Bert desperately pleaded for an easy solution.

"Is there any way out of here!" screamed Bert at the top of his lungs, while banging his fists against the wall.

"Aww. My headache!" said Baby Bear.

"Awh..." started Grover. "How does your head hurt from eating too much ketchup?"

"It's not just ketchup!" said the voice from above. Jigsaw, that is.

"Why? What else is in there?" asked Ernie.

"Booze," replied Jigsaw.

"What?" they all asked.

"This is a kid's show! How dare you!" said Grover.

"Oh, but I do,"said Jigsaw. "And this next game will be impossible with the hangovers you all will soon possess." He added an evil laugh to the end of his sentence so you could tell he was serious.

So, beer in the ketchup. This would explain Grover's constant vomiting, Baby Bear's headache, and Elmo's seemingly deathless journey through this series of twisted games. However, they weren't going to let a little drunkenness get the better of them. The monsters were determined to finish the games, (or die trying), and get back to Sesame Street, once and for all.

Bert kept hitting the wall, to the point when he was using his whole body to try to get it to collapse, but to no avail. Ernie warned him not to keep doing that. However, he continued to do so, but after a while he died of exhaustion. He was hyperventilating through the whole thing. Instead of slamming Bert's body into the wall to coincide with his dying wish, the monsters just gave up and played tag instead.

"You're it!" shouted Grover as he tagged Cookie Monster.

Cookie Monster ran around a little bit and considered his options, then went for a cornered Elmo as he tried to jump top shelf and make a break for it.

"You're it," said Cookie Monster.

"You're it back," replied Elmo as he tagged Cookie Monster.

"What? No tag backs!" explained Cookie Monster.

"Sorry, Cookie Monster. Elmo didn't know," said Elmo as he hung his head below his neck.

"It's okay," said Cookie Monster. "Here! Let me give you high five!"

Elmo held up his right hand and Cookie Monster gave him a high-five.

"Hah! You're it!" said Cookie Monster while running away. However karma didn't play on his side from then on. While running from Elmo he tripped over Bert's corpse and smacked his head on the cold, ketchupy concrete surface. This smacking, however, was just enough to trigger the lowering of the floor. The floor seemed to descend. First slower, then speed increased. It got so fast now that it fell from under them and the gravity weighing the monsters down just wasn't able to keep up. They all floated in the air, as they saw the floor disappear from under them. Now, the monsters were just freefalling into the unknown, completely lost as to where they were going.

Finally, they landed. But before they could tell what they landed on, the room went dark.

"What's going on?" asked a scared Elmo.

"I'm actually not sure what happened there," said Jigsaw. "I was trying to put more booze-ketchup in there, when all of a sudden the floor starts moving. But, um, the bad news is that two of you are dead, and the rest of you are all seriously maimed or injured."

"Well, that sucks," said Baby Bear.

"Wait, then," said Ernie. "Who's dead?"

"Let's try calling out people's names," suggested Baby Bear. "Grover! You here, buddy?"

No response.

"Arright, Grover's dead," said Baby Bear.

"Cookie Monster! You there?"

All that was heard of him was a scream of pain and his final word: COOOOOKKKIIIEEEEEE.

"Cookie's gone, too!" said Ernie. "Oh, no. What are we gonna do?"

"Elmo doesn't know," replied Elmo. "But we can't all die from this! Elmo thinks that Elmo, Baby Bear, and Ernie have to try really hard not to die. Elmo needs to become... Immortal."

"I don't see that happening," said Jigsaw.

"I disagree. I think it might happen."

Elmo, Baby Bear, and Ernie became perplexed. Who was that voice? The room was silent while everybody tried to think that over.

"Don't you see, guys, it's me, Tele!"

"What? Tele? You're alive?" asked an excited Ernie.

"But I thought you were sentenced to an eternity of Lady Gaga!" said Baby Bear.

"I busted out by changing the music to that of Jane's Addiction," said Tele.

Yes, Tele had broken out of the torturous Lady Gaga room. Over time, the sound of the bass chipped away at Tele's chair, causing it to burst into pieces after the 400th time "Poker Face" had been played. From there, he grabbed the iPod playing the song and changed the song to "Jane Says." That song triggered the opening of the door and the nails in Tele's feel disintegrated. He ran out and joined Elmo and the others there. Thus proving that Jane's Addiction can save lives.

Meanwhile, Elmo, Ernie, Baby Bear, and now Tele were just sitting there licking their wounds and waiting for something to happen. They talked about everything. Sports, music, art, education, and made a public service announcement here and there. Ultimately, they were quite bored with each other and wished to get the next bloodbath over with. Time would soon grant that wish.


End file.
